I like to think that my moods and interactions with the world are pretty constant. The sine wave of my mood volatility is pretty flat. I like that. Who know, perhaps that is only a perception I have of myself and the world does not share that perception of me. I will work with my perception for now. There are times, however, when a dark mood comes to roost for awhile. It is not my natural state, so it kind of throws me off kilter. Last night was such a night. There were a few minor things that irritated me and I let me get under my skin. I like to be more resilient than that, but that is the way it goes. I guess the purpose of these darker moods and moments is to lower our resilience and see how we react to the irritations of our environment.
During these periods, I tend to be much less patient and kick into problem solving mode. I guess, I turn into that guy from the show mantracker, except I an trying to track down problems and the source of my dark mood. That is amusing in itself, but don’t laugh at me, ’cause that will probably just irritate me more. Truth be found and told, the best things for me to do is to sit and absorb the moment. It is but another facet of life to be experienced. Chances are, my problemtracker efforts would be mostly burning off energy without accomplishing too much anyways. You can always count on a dark mood to mess with your perceptions of the world around you. No use trying to find and solve problems that some mood constructed to send me on a goose chase.
Thankfully, I am not a moody person and these moments are infrequent and fleeting. With that, I am going to alter my perception and reaction to them. It is sort of like going to a new restaurant for the first time and ordering some exotic dish with ingredients you cannot pronounce; it is an adventure. It is an opportunity to experience something new. Opportunities should be explored, not squandered. I relish the variety of experiences I have had through life so far, I look forward to many more. The next dark moment that comes to call now has a welcome home. I will be grateful for the visit and the what the moment has to offer.
Namaste.
Clouds come floating into my life, no longer to carry rain or usher storm, but to add color to my sunset sky.~ Rabindranath Tagore
I am enjoying reading your reflections. What a great journey you are on. I like this post…it reminds me of something I heard a speaker at a conference say once “welcome all that is arising”. I like how you this blog is helping you be thankful for all manner of things including times when you are slightly shifting your view of something to be thankful of it as well.
Thank you Danielle. I really appreciate your encouragement. This is a very interesting and challenging journey for me. I am always under the impression that no-one reads this blog, which I guess it what gives me the courage to post sometimes. Easier to share when I think I am the only one that will see it. 🙂
Sometimes, I think I am reckless posting online, but that is but another fear to be met and conquered. Thank you again for your words of encouragement.
Namaste,
Matt